BIG Shifts Chat: Angela Barnes
Angela is no stranger to BIG Shifts. She's experienced a difficult marriage to a Vietnam Vet, an almost fatal car crash, estrangement with one of her daughters and her mom, Janet Barnes, was the longest living quadraplegic in the Guiness World Records.
In talking about her own BIG Shifts experiences she says, “The me before was existing, living, getting things done, and excelling at work because I sure didn't excel at living. The me I am now I have a heart, people are in my world and I'm in their world. I've shifted from shrapnel and shards to rose petals and breadcrumbs.”
Her are highlights from our call:
- Write. Let words out. Not for others, but for yourself.
- Hang in for glimpses of light.
- Survival is part of our life. But … Are you merely existing? Don't just survive, thrive.
- Announce your new life and do it!
- Get rid of excess junk and stuff. How can you receive the good stuff if you hold onto the gunk? Don't hold onto it. Turn it loose.
- One of the greatest challenges of being present is being in your own way, clouding your own thoughts and camouflaging your real life by seeing what is old and drudged up and not what's really there.
- Don't allow hatefulness and hurt, and lack of appreciation, in your world. Create a supportive environment. Angela created house rules and had friends support her in them. Here were her 3 rules: Love. Acceptance. No Bitching. For a year no one entered her environment without love and acceptance.
- You can't control what's out there. You can control what comes to you.
- Don't talk bad to yourself. Take care of you. Make time to get to know yourself.
- Get rid of accumulation. Clean out a closet, share some books, take out the trash. Do something to reduce.
- Open your hands. Stop hoarding.
- Take a beauty bath. If you have a beauty deficit, get out there and walk with beauty, walk with nature. It's free. It's available.
- We can help heal ourselves. Write a love letter to yourself from someone you'd most like to hear loving words.
- Survive. Thrive. Live.
- Find peace easily in beauty. Beauty is a conduit to peace.
- Love is present. Notice it. Angela discovered this in the faces of people everywhere on her trip to India.
- Be tender and nice to yourself. Do NOT beat yourself up. If it's a challenge to be kind to yourself find 3 positive things to say. Say it out loud. It will change some of the negativity you may not have words for.
- There is something admirable in each one of us. Name it and claim it.